Education Secretary Anne Duncan has proposed renaming the No Child Left Behind Act; thankfully eduwonk.com is soliciting the rabble for a new name.
A sampling:
Hey, Teacher, Leave Those Kids Alone Act
All American Children Are Above Average Act
Double Back Around to Pick Up the Children We Left Behind Act
the Rearranging the Deck Chairs Act
Most are in the vein of "the Teach to the Test Act," though less witty and just really cynical and pessimistic. It's pretty dispiriting to look at the national mood regarding education reform.
Perhaps it's just become infected by association with our dearly departed president.
Thankfully the Onion has just the allegory: a White House haunting (just as Kubrick would want it).
Sasha Obama Keeps Seeing Creepy Bush Twins While Riding Her Tricycle Through the White HouseAHHH!!
Sasha, who was playing in the East Wing of the executive mansion so as not to disturb her busy father, reported seeing the former first twins while riding her Big Wheel tricycle down the Cross Hall corridor. The frightening apparitions, the 7-year-old said, emerged out of thin air and were dressed in identical outfits consisting of spaghetti strap tank tops and denim skirts.
[...]According to White House security documents, Sasha told Secret Service agents that the ghostly twins spoke to her in unison and repeatedly beckoned her by chanting the phrases "come play with us," "come play with us, forever," and "Daddy's making fajitas."
White House officials, speaking on condition of anonymity, also detailed a disturbing vision experienced by Sasha, who at several points during her encounter suddenly saw the twin girls lying motionless in a pool of spilled strawberry margaritas.
"She said they kept whispering 'we want to party' over and over again," said one Secret Service agent, who comforted Sasha following the incident. "God, it's so horrifying."
With her father often tied up with work for hours on end, this is not the first time Sasha has reported seeing malevolent spirits while exploring the 132-room mansion. Earlier this week, the 7-year-old was startled to find an angry, silver-haired woman named Barbara in the Map Room, and on Monday, the first daughter saw what appeared to be former attorney general John Ashcroft lying naked and unconscious in a bathroom tub.
No comments:
Post a Comment